Thursday, 14 June 2012

Lines Across Eye

So Kari has a theory. She's insisting that they know about these blogs, that they're using them to follow us. She keeps saying that if we stop posting on our blogs, they won't know where we are. Something about the blogging being a

what was the word she used?

a histemin...something. I looked it up. It's the response to a disease, like sneezing. A way to try and fix illness, and often enough it just spreads it. But she thinks it's a compulsion. She's on radio silence, and she doesn't know I'm writing.

I think she's talking crap, and Natalie agrees. We're humouring her with the blogging - as far as she knows - but we're staying connected. Not that we could tell if they weren't tracking us. Kari's insisting that we move every other day, with a rest day inbetween. She's even more paranoid about moving around than we are.

Kari's...Kari's something we weren't ready for. She's very, very good at hiding what's wrong with her. Very convincing. She's been hiding it for a while now, you can tell. But at the same time, around the edge? Emotionally crippled, unflinchingly exploitative, unhesitatingly criminal. When the fa├žade falls, Natalie can barely control her, and I'm at a loss here. At the same time, though, she seems like she's being sincere to us, and it's been almost a month, so I guess we'll have to trust her.

Then again, we have no idea what her agenda is. And she has one. She's smart, smarter than either of us by a long way. I can only hope her goals runs parallel to our own. I want to trust her but I can't shake the notion that she'd stab us in the back with even the slightest provocation. I want to be able to talk to Natalie about this. I know she must be feeling the same way. I could see the relief at having someone else around give way to her panic at who she'd gotten weeks ago. But it's impossible to get her alone. Kari's always there. Either way, I'm losing confidence that this will end well for anyone involved here.

1 comment:

  1. Please be careful. We lose enough people to this crap, we don't need to kill each other off too.